Who are we?

Does anybody else out there think they have a different persona on social media to the one they share in the real world?

When I first started blogging I wrote a post about masks and how nearly everyone on Fictionpress (where I first got online) had a creative pen name.  It felt safer in those days to hide behind a creation.  It was easier too to me be myself when nobody (including me, half the time) knew who that was.

A great deal has changed in the last few years.


masks for sale on the Rialto Bridge in Venice.

I don’t want to spend this post moaning about my job, which isn’t all bad.  There are days however when it leaves me feeling like a broken toy.  I still haven’t perfected the knack of taking that bad phone call or rising above the constant IT issues without getting angry, stressed or eating too much chocolate.

At work I can regularly be unhelpful, stressful, selfish and snappy.  All in self-defence of my own insecurities of course!

I’m not at all like that here.  On social media, I’m chatty, helpful and have almost mastered the art of making polite conversation about things that aren’t always writing related.

I want to say that the social media me is the ‘real me’, but that’s far too simplistic.  The social media ‘me’ is the ‘me’ I’d like to be.  And, of course, I find it easier to be here when there is less pressure and I’m sharing things I love with people who love them too.

Doesn’t everybody?

So, I guess now that I have come out of hiding and am using the name I was born with online, I’m searching for a way to take more of the social media ‘me’ back into the real world. Long term it’s going to be much less confusing than carrying this Jekyll and Hyde thing about.

Any tips? Or does anyone feel that they have a ‘real world’ persona and a social media persona?


8 thoughts on “Who are we?

  1. We were just talking about this at our small writing-critique group meeting. We have a new member that we all new casually prior and she was kind of nervous about jumping in with an established group that knew each other so well – which resulted in her being very soft spoken. I told her I was surprised b/c that’s not how she comes across on FB. She said “I know – I’m much louder on Facebook. And a lot edgier on Twitter.” I guess having more time to react and think about our contributions does result in a better version of us. Fun post, Debbie!

    • Thanks so much for sharing Shel. I’m working up the nerve to join a writing group too – it’ll be interesting to see what sort of face I show them too.

  2. I think that I’m more patient online than I might be in person, but a large part of my ‘voice’ or ‘uniqueness’ comes from my somewhat sarcastic personality. However, I feel like only certain facets can ever come across online, meaning that no one can really portray themselves online as who they really are.

    • That’s true – only certain facets can come across online. And I’ve often found, when writing emails, that the tone can be lost quite easily.
      I think sometimes in the ‘real world’ it can be hard to show who you are too.
      Thnask for commenting.

  3. I have a ‘real me’ and a ‘work me’ – the work me is more decorous (well, a bit) because I work in a school, although I’ve been working on being the ‘real me’ as much as possible because at one time I felt that I was having to be two different people and that I was losing my identity to the restrictions of my job. I think the online me is the ‘real me’ pretty much all of the time, but maybe a bit more confident. Interesting post, Debbie!

  4. Thanks Linda.
    I think it can pay to be decorous at work, even if not in a school. There are things at work that I think all teh time but just don’t say.
    It can be hard to be the real you wherever though. There is always so many cultural and personal expectations we layer over ourselves that can get in the way.
    Good luck working on being the real you – I hoep you get there.

  5. Interesting post honey 🙂

    I think I’m the same in real life as what I am on social media, at least I try to be. But I think you would have to ask someone who knows me in real life whether they would agree 😉


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